Life is at it again.

 Well, another pay day down in the books.

The new job is great. I love what I do. I've even lost some weight which has been good for my mental health. But now.......

They cut my hours, they aren't doing what they say they will do and my paycheck....it's missing. *sigh* I just don't know what to do. I put in leave to go to my brothers wedding and to Nevada with everyone. My guy is supposed to be here for those 2 weeks and go with me but low and behold, my leave has not been approved.

I applied for my Kure Beach job back and I got an offer. I think I'm going to take it. Just move back. If he is going to be coming out here from the 3rd to the 17th then I might as well just drive back with him and accept that job and at least have the comfort of my own stuff, my own place, my job that I know and can get extra hours OR the possibility of being a regular. I'm so torn and I just don't know what to do. My heart is breaking and I hate it. It's been broken since I got here. My happy just isn't happy.

However.....

This last weekend was the first time I actually thought I might miss it here if I leave. I mean, I will miss my family like crazy if I leave but it was the first time I thought I might miss life here. Maybe if I stay longer it will all work out but I can't afford to just not have hours and missing paychecks and all.

So this last weekend was the Sunflower Festival, a Honey Festival and the Balloon Launch at the Stratobowl.  It was so great hanging out with my sister and everyone else. It was a packed full weekend and it really was one of the best so far.

So to start, the Sunflower Festival in Nisland. I got to see baby goats!!!! They were so stinking cute! I could live on a farm with goats again for sure and be happy. We got there a little later in the day so a lot of the flowers had been cut and picked already but my sister was still able to get a pretty great assortment and some really pretty sunflowers.

After we left the Sunflower Festival we headed to Spearfish for a beer and the 1st Annual Honey Festival. I learned a lot about raising honey bees at this one. We got to see them remove the wax from the honey comb and they put it into a spinner to spin out the rest of the honey. It was really cool and the honey wasn't as sweet as the stuff you by at the store which was weird but I liked it.

After we left there we stopped and got something to eat. I wanted a grilled cheese and this one came with avocado and tomato which I was not real fond of but I still ate it. I also had to get some of the sweet potato waffle fries too. Those were so good!

That was all we did on Saturday.

Sunday morning we woke up at 3am and were out the door by 330am to go see the balloon launch. I've never been to it before and it's been going on for a very long time. My sisters went last year and this year I was able to join them. It was so perfect. The weather was amazing, not too cold but definitely chilly. The balloons went right over our heads which was so awesome. It's something I highly recommend if you are in the Rapid City area next time. Truly a sight to see. This year they had 13 balloons that went up. Pretty much at the same time and they landed at Reptile Gardens. I remember being in the one in Australia with my mom and man, I'd love to go again if I ever got the chance. (If you'd like to see the blog post on that one check it out here..... Australia Day 10 )

Here are some of my favorite photos of Sunday morning.

After the ballon launch we went to breakfast. 99 cent all you can eat pancakes at a place called Fort Hayes. It was this really cool place where Dances With Wolves was filmed. The pancakes were pretty ok. The bacon was super thick and was alright. After we ate we walked around and enjoyed the sights for a while. This cute teapot I thought would be really cute as an actual bird house, just take off the lid and let the birds build the nest inside the tea pot. I think I might make one for my mom one day. She loves bird houses. I could even make the bottom part a little feeder. Just add some seed to the saucer. It would be so cute!

The only other thing we did this weekend was watch the 1st Denver Bronco game of the season at my brothers house. I've always been and will always be a Bronco fan. He made 5lbs of wings and some amazing jalapeno poppers and it was all so good! The Broncos won too. 

I didn't get to stay for the whole game, just up until half time. I had to go home and go to bed so I wouldn't be super tired for work Monday morning at 2am.

So you see how this past weekend really made me feel like I liked being here. I don't know why this weekend was so different then the rest. We are always doing things and for some reason, this past weekend was the one that I loved the most.

And then today happens and I cried and was angry and felt sorry for myself so I went and did this......

I went to the park and sat on the swings for about an hour. I grabbed me a coffee from the gas station and just went and enjoyed the peaceful morning on the swings, thinking about what I should do with my future. If I should accept that job and just go back to North Carolina where life was easier and money was there. Where I have my stuff and my kids and my guy. Where I can see that ocean and breath the salty air and feel peace clear down in my soul. Is it worth leaving here? Upsetting the family?

I just need to breath.......

~Till Next Time~